First Birthday Fail...

...my phone crashed the day after Josephine's 1st birthday party. I have zero photos, except maybe a few blurred ones I got from my regular camera. Every photo, video, anything that was saved on my iphone - GONE. (Which includes Jos' first steps bytheway. I can't even talk about it, or I'll be a blubbering mess at work.)
*I would just like to say, I know this is my fault - that everything up until that day was wiped out. I should've known better & backed up my photos on a monthly, if not weekly, basis.

What kills me is, that night, after her party I thought: I should upload these at least to icloud before bed...and then thought, I'll do it tomorrow....
I had such a good time making her decorations. There were a lot of late nights, and trips to Hobby Lobby - but the personal touches meant a lot to me. I have nothing to show for it. Even though I fail her, probably everyday - she loves me. And it shouldn't matter that I don't have photos from this day - but I found myself in tears every hour on the hour since the moment I discovered I couldn't get them back. And it does matter to me. I feel like I failed her. This must seem so silly, but if you're a mom - I feel like you'd understand :) It's just, in this last year, I've learned so much about myself. Just in her one year of life, she's made me want to go above & beyond...to be a better person. I just wanted this day to be perfect. For her. And it was! I just don't have the pictures to go with this great day....

I did bring my regular camera, and did take some pictures with it - but I went back to see what I had, it wasn't very much. I have some video from the day, so that's good.

Maybe this week I'll find myself in a better mood to post a more uplifting "fun" post about the party. It really was a good time, and we are extremely blessed by all those that came to celebrate the day with us....